Now that the election campaign is officially on, over the next few weeks I’ll be posting a series of blogs outlining what I’d do if elected to government.

If I were elected to office …

I would legislate that all renovation/home improvement/gardening/infotainment TV programs must be shown in real time. No more installing your own Feng Shui solar powered herbal essence jacuzzi within a 3 minute TV segment. No, it would have to be a season long directors cut extended version showing everything, from the haggling with family members over colour schemes, wrestling with spreadsheets to estimate quantities and pricing, multiple trips to multitudinous vendors to acquire the necessary supplies and tools, the weeks of waiting for the weather to co-operate, the hours of grueling manual labour, and most especially the ever irksome job of cleaning up afterwards.If I were elected to office, no more would the alluring and honeyed tones of overpaid TV presenters deceive us with 3 minute installations of Turkish gazebos, organic chook sheds, or oriental tie-dyed yoga hammocks. In my hands Australia would be saved from this odious form of unreality TV.

Vote 1. Me.

Christopher Webb – I cast my vote in thy general direction

[This content was originally posted to Google Buzz, #33]